GuestJanuary 15, 2014
Hi there. My name is Gloria, and I thought that I would answer the call for writers. I’m going to try and post on the Eye of the Fish for a while, while the other writers are on holiday. Lucky for some. I thought that I might just start off gently, with a post on dream beach-side houses, as that is what I would really rather be doing. I’m not sure where I got all these images from, other than: the internet, but am happy to credit the source if anyone can provide it. Not sure if there is much I will say about these pictures, except to say that they are gorgeous…
This one, of course, is the dream view from my dream house… Endless sea, endless sky, and curiously, an entire wall full of doors and windows seems to have disappeared. Which I kind of like, although I’m not sure where they have gone to. Perhaps they are on holiday as well?
It’s not to say that I only like modern buildings – I like the old things in life too. Like this beautiful window looking out over a lake, which somehow just seems to have the right sort of attitude – one that old buildings often don’t. It allows you – no, encourages you to peer out at the view as well. Just lovely!
This next image is, I feel, a spiritual twin to the last one, although I’m not even sure if they are in the same country, let alone the same building. It is a set of water-steps, on the shores of a lake somewhere in Austria or Switzerland. An old-fashioned sense of grace – or perhaps just wads and wads of money – I have a feeling that this place belongs to George Clooney or some other gorgeous older man. Probably some ugly fat bureaucrat from Braunschweig, but please don’t spoil my fantasy. Actually, from memory, I think this is also used in the James Bond film Casino Royale, where Daniel Craig goes to recuperate after having the baddie whip him on his bare buttocks. A scene that was most distasteful, not just at the masochism, but also the non-aesthetic thought of poor Daniel sitting there with his balls and willie hanging out through the bottom of the chair. I don’t think he would ever be so good in bed again after all that, do you? Perish the thought!
Next: back to the future:
I really do like the thought of a bach actually floating on, or suspended over water. Maybe this is difficult to do in Aotearoa, where the foreshore and seabed belongs to – umm, to who exactly now? I’ve forgotten – except that it isn’t me. Was it the public? Or the iwi? Or no one? Or the Crown? Seems a shame for the Queen to have it all, as she is never going to use it. Anyhow, public usage aside, wouldn’t it be nice to have a house like this? And so why don’t we do it?
And of course, no desk would be complete without some gorgeous naked people lounging all over it. I want this to be me.
Or perhaps I could just lounge around on this day bed, with some hand-maidens and man-servants bringing me bunches of fresh fruit to eat, and giving me a nice smooth relaxing massage… I’m getting sleepy already.
At the end of the day, I guess that all I really want is somewhere to enjoy the peace and quiet, and somewhere to call home. I might not be able to afford the big flash modern pads, but this little place looks just perfect for my budget. Now, where can I find a spare rock…