The Eye of the Fish

May 21, 2018

Republic revolution

It was hard to ignore all the hype, but I managed. I went away for the weekend to a remote hut in the bush, with no electricity or internet or tv, just a fireplace and a transistor radio, which I turned off when the Royal Wedding started. I’m clearly not one of these sad pathetic people:
but nor am I yet one of these Republicans (in the true, non-American sense of the word) who held their annual conference in London at the same time as the wedding of Harry and Sally:
Meanwhile some of my friends were having a party in Greenwich in London. Perfect day for a party in a park.
But did I miss anything? Well, yes, apart from everything – the thing I have gathered from the coverage since getting back to dry land – is the car that Harry drove away in. Full marks there, both for style and for innovation.
Let’s face it – the Prius is an ugly car, and badly designed, with no headroom for anyone larger than a dwarf in the back, and no discernable element of style that I can see. It’s the main reason why I haven’t got an electric car – its ugly and its boring, both cardinal sins for architects.

Whereas this repurposed E-type is as gorgeous as ever (the most beautiful car ever made?) and, despite the sacrilege of taking the v8 or v12 engine out, the wonderful thing is that they have made it powered by electrickery. All the papers commented on that – no one seemed to have commented on it being a left-hand drive. Clearly then it has been made either in the USA, or from a car that was sourced in the USA, much like the bride. In fact, the car is a metaphor for the whole Royal family really. A brilliantly styled, wonderful old anachronism, great at pomp and pageantry, updated with a vital upgrade of American energy and invigoration.

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Look at the shape of that door and the way it fits into the overall form – sublime.

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Indeed. Everyone should be driving cars that are this beautiful.

I would like, in all seriousness, to look under the bonnet. It’s a vast engine bay, into which a v12 can, on occasion, be squeezed – and not needed at all in an electric drive. So – engine out. Transmission out. Is it just a large bed of battery cells? I must admit also – the back seat of a Jag is probably the only one worse than the back seat of a Prius….

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Andy Foster
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Ah Leviathan.
I am a definitely a royalist at heart. No idea why – maybe it’s Presidents that give me the heebeegeebees. Maybe it’s being an Anglophile. To be fair monarchies haven’t had a flash history at times, but neither have any form of government !
The E type Jag on the other hand. Definitely my pick for the most beautiful car of all time.
And yes – I did watch the wedding and enjoyed it – despite the American preacher going OTT !

23 - 05 - 18

Andy – glad we agree on the E-type – harder to park than your trusty 10 speed, but undeniably more sexy….

It’s interesting that you (and many, many other people) have called the Very Reverent Michael Curry a preacher – when he is, of course, a Bishop. Just has a different way of preaching when compared to the British Bishops….. However, as I didn’t watch the wedding, I still haven’t got a clue why you say he was OTT. Don’t people at weddings always go banging on about being in love? It is fairly repulsive really, as we all know that most marriages don’t last, more likely than not end in divorce, and in this case (with the public pressure and the never-ending paparazzi) it is almost bound to fail.

Marriage should be – if anything – more like a license to breed, for a maximum of two children only, for a maximum of seven years, and then you’re both free to go. Makes up for the inevitable! And those ridiculous people who go out with each other for ten years before they eventually get hitched – the love has already gone. At least Megan and Jimmy had the right idea – meet up one year, bonk madly, get married the next year, produce children rapidly, and then bugger off within a decade.

PS – I’m available for good wedding and relationship advice like this, anytime. Book me at Eye of the Fish.
PPS – We’ll also do bar mitzvahs at a pinch too. Give me enough whisky and I’ll do the circumcision too.
PPPS – Stop while you’re ahead! Like I do!

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Who is Jimmy ?

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Jimmy? Oh, sorry, I meant the bloke getting married. Wazzisname. Larry, Barry, whatever. Who gives a toss anyway? Monkey faced ginger fella. You know the one…. Looks like Ed Sheeran.